The Alphabet of Sex – H Is For Horny

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Ever since I moved to the UK, I’ve noticed that they use this word a lot – horny, meaning very turned on and in need of a good fucking. I love the word because it sounds dirty and naughty without being too “in your face.” But do you ever have times when you’re just not feeling horny at all? Whether you’re stressed at work or have a demanding home life, it’s not easy to get in the mood for sex.

I believe we should feel naughty all of the time, so I thought I’d share my favorite ways of being able to feel horny all day long.

1 – Wear sexy lingerie

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It doesn’t matter where you’re going, what you’re doing or who you’re doing it with, wearing sexy lingerie just automatically makes you feel horny. I could be running to the store in my sweats with tied back hair and filthy sneakers, but I always have hot panties on. There’s something about the feeling of satin and lace against my pussy which just makes me feel permanently horny. And if you feel sexy on the inside, it shows on the outside. So throw out any unflattering underwear and splash out on a whole new drawer of gorgeous lingerie to make you feel special all of the time. Buy sexy lingerie here.

2. Use scent

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I mean not just perfumes, but anything from scented candles and incense, to aromatic foods and, of course, our own unique scents. I love being surrounded by smells like sandalwood, patchouli and musk, because they ignite past memories of great sex and former lovers who were fabulous bed. But my favorite scent is always that raw smell of sex, it’s our natural pheromones working overtime to excite us. If you’re single, or in a relationship where the sex is just not happening, then don’t be afraid to satisfy yourself. When I masturbate, I love smelling myself afterwards, that hot rawness of my own pussy is just the best smell out there. Buy sexy scents here.

3. Watch a naughty movie

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Feeling horny is all about stimulating the senses, so if you and your lover need a kick in the right direction, either check out some of the hot pornos out there right now, or log in to a live sex show online – there are lots of websites offering live voyeuristic sex and most of them are secure to use. There’s nothing hotter than lying with your lover and watching other people have sex. How can you not get in the mood after that? Get naughty movies here.

4. Invest in a new sex toy

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We’ve already touched on masturbation (excuse the pun!) but even if you have a treasure chest full of sex toys, it’s easy to get bored with the same old vibrators and dildos, so maybe it’s time to expand your sexual horizons and look at purchasing something new. My personal favorites include anal beads, which I use at the same time as a vibe on my clit to give me an extra sensation from my ass when I orgasm. I also love those cute little vibrators which fit in your panties. They’re basically clit-sized, and remote-controlled, so you can just slip them in as you go about your day and get yourself off quick and easy as and when you need to. You can also buy the built-in version attached to special panties. I get mine from Sienna Sinclaire’s store, here.

BBx

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The Alphabet of Sex – G is for G Spot

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G is for G-Spot

No, it’s not a myth. Women really do have G-spots – that magical place inside us which, when triggered, releases a torrent of climactic goodness. Tragically, it’s not just men who don’t believe in its existence, plenty of women, too, have never experienced what it’s like to have their G-spot stimulated, because they just don’t know where it is.

It’s rare that women climax vaginally, and that’s because our main pleasure point, our clitoris, is located outside the body, and away from where contact is made when we fuck. Sure, we can use vibrators or get our lovers (but usually ourselves!) to stimulate us during sex, so we have at least a small chance of orgasming at the same time as the guys, but even if that happens, I promise you that a clitoral orgasm is NOTHING LIKE a G-Spot orgasm. For this reason alone, women must make it their mission to find, and have their lover find, this super-sensitive place inside us, because once that happens, sex will never be the same again… So,how to find it?

This is written for guys, to help you become superheroes in the bedroom, but women too can learn a few tips. Remember, sex toys are your friend, and there are loads of G-spot vibrators out there so you can have some saucy G-spot fun all by yourself. My favorites include the Je T’aime Le Point G and the Waterproof G-Spot Glitz. If you’re a beginner, try the inexpensive My First G-Spot Massager in pink, until you’re ready to graduate to the bigger models.

 1.  How to find it

gpotGet your lover to lie on her back somewhere comfortable – on the bed or in the bath. Insert one two fingers up inside her vagina, then feel backwards, as though you were ‘hooking’ her back. You should feel some lightt ridges and then a smooth, fleshy spot. This is the G-spot! You’ll know when you’ve hit the spot, as she might get an urge to pee. The G-spot is located on the urethra wall, so touching it can trigger that sensation. She’s unlikely to pee, so don’t worry, it’s just a false alarm!

You can also use a sex toy to find her G-spot. As mentioned, there are plenty of vibrators and dildos specifically designed to trigger the G-spot, so don’t be afraid to get some help.

2. How to work her

fingerOnce you’ve located her G-spot, begin to massage it slowly and lightly. Touch her in a rhythm that suits you both and feel how her body responds to your touch. Feel how her other genitals respond, too – her clitoris, her mons pubis, her vulva…they all have a role to play here. Just go with the flow and keep that massage rhythm going – you’ll soon know how fast or slow to go. The important thing is for your lover to know that she can just let go and leave herself in your capable hands.

3. What will happen

orgasmG-spots are very powerful things. It’ll help if your lover empties her bladder, for reasons already mentioned, because when that orgasm hits, she’ll definitely want to surrender to the waterfall of climax, which often means lots of other muscles around that area will relax. What you don’t want, is for your lover to try and hold her orgasm, afraid that she’ll pee if she lets go. She needs to feel totally at ease and able to just go with the flow of her climax. If she does this, that climax will be ten times more powerful than anything she’s experienced clitorally. The easy solution for those peeing/orgasming fears, is to have sex in the bath – that way it doesn’t matter!

When she approaches climax, encourage her that it’s OK to let go, to not hold anything back. Just like guys, she’ll feel a powerful urge to ejaculate. All she’s doing is expelling the fluid which has built up inside her during arousal, exactly the same as you do. The first time she does this, she might be surprised about how much cum she releases, but one thing she won’t argue with is the immense pleasure now flooding through her body.

So if you want to be ‘that guy’ who is the only one able to stimulate your lover this way, get practising on her. Then, when you’re an expert with your hands, start training your cock to hit that magic spot every time. Just knowing that her pleasure is your No.1 priority, should be enough to earn you some Brownie points, and who knows how she’ll want to repay you!

Have fun!

BBx

The Alphabet of Sex – F is for Fucking

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F is for Fucking…

Of course it is! Everybody should fuck as often as possible – it’s great for mind, body and soul. Don’t make the mistake of thinking sex is just a physical, animal thing. It’s way more than that. Obviously, it’s different for men and women – but us girls are actually luckier because we have lots of ways of cumming, whereas guys tend to rely on their cocks. So I thought I’d share my own favorite positions, so girls can get experimenting, and guys can get educating!

 1.  The Fold-In-Half

This might sound painful, but it’s really not. Girls, lie back on the bed and put a pillow under your butt. Then lift your legs up as though you’re about to hook them over your lover’s shoulders, but keep them lifted and pull them even further back towards you – as though you’re bending yourself in half. The pillow gives leverage and support so it’s really not uncomfortable. Your lover will then be able to push his cock much deeper inside you. I find that my G-spot gets a real workout in this position, and when it feels like I’m about to cum, I then tell my lover to lift himself a little, so he can grind against my clit as he fucks me faster. Seconds later, I’m cumming from inside and out. Takes practice, but once you get the rhythm right, this is mindblowing.

2. The Flat Doggy

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Doggy-style – the guys love this but it’s a real winner for us girls, too, if you do it right. Being fucked from behind lets your lover get a real grip on your hips so he can pound you to his heart’s content. They love seeing our tits swing below us, as well (although this can get painful for those girls with planet-size globes!). Here’s a different way of doing the doggy, though. Lie flat on your stomach, and raise your ass a little so he can get inside you. When he’s into his rhythm, the friction is amazing as he presses down on top of you, and you also get to grind your clit into the bed underneath you. You don’t have to have stamina, because you’re lying down, and he’s doing all the work – bonus! Seriously, though, this position is ideal because it doesn’t take practice and you don’t need to be superfit. It’s a guaranteed climax-shaker, the next best thing to being fucked in your sleep, really. Mmmm.

3. The Cowgirl

So-called because you’re riding him on top, and I always like to tell my lover to “giddy up!”. Have your lover lie down, his legs slightly apart. Then get on top of him with your back to him, keep your legs together with your feet sitting in between his own legs. Then lower yourself onto his cock, and get riding. Because your legs are together, you’re going to feel much tighter on his cock, and you get the tightness of him, too. You can ‘swivel’ in this position, too, so give him some face time so he can watch your tits as you ride him, then turn back for when you really want to get thrusting. Use his knees and thighs as supports for your hands, and don’t neglect your clit, either – you have great access to it with this position. Better still, have your lover rub you off as you’re riding him.

4. On the Table!

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One of my most erotic sexual experiences, was being fucked on the kitchen table by my new lover who just couldn’t wait to get me to the bedroom. It really was like something from the movies, the way he just swept everything aside, threw me down, pulled my skirt up and dragged my hips to the edge of the table, before thrusting his cock right up into me, all within about 10 seconds. It was delicious, and not just the spontaneity of it, but also the feel. Your lover can get really, really deep inside you by doing it this way. If you hook your legs over his shoulders, you can pull him closer when it suits you, and he also has great access to your clit. By standing up, he gets more thrusting power and rhythm control, and all you have to do is lie back and let him work his magic.

5. The Stripper

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Possibly my favorite, because it involves real intimacy. I sit on my lover’s lap, like a lap dancer, and slide onto his cock. Then I grind my clit against him, leaning back a little so my tits are in his face, which he loves to feast on as he slow-fucks me. This can go on forever, as slow or as pumping as we like. You basically have total control over when and how you cum. We can kiss, suck, lick, all while his cock is hot inside me, and I love it when a guy’s sucking on my tits as he fucks me, so this position is ideal. I go totally off into a world of my own and the orgasm is incredible. Sometimes, when he knows I’m about to cum, he gently pushes me off him, onto my back, and goes down on me just in time for him to lick me to distraction. Timing is crucial on that one!

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The Alphabet Of Sex – ‘A’ Is For Anal

It’s easy to think that, in these open times, where nothing seems to be taboo anymore, that people everywhere are just ‘getting on with it’, free of any inhibitions, and are more than willing to explore anything and everything.

I actually think the opposite is true. The internet, and social media in general, may have opened up the world to anyone with access, but it’s also making people paranoid. They’re thinking everybody else seems to be having great sex, except me. Is there something wrong with me?

Of course, that’s rubbish. But it is true that many people are simply just too afraid/embarrassed/lazy to address bedroom and body issues that, with a little dedication, education, and a whole lot of experimentation, could mean the difference between a life of orgasmic discovery, and one of tragically missed opportunities.

With this in mind, I thought it would be fun to start an Alphabet of Sex. Not just to talk about 26 different things to do with sex, but to try and address serious questions, explode a few urban myths, and also get people out there having fun, doing things they might not otherwise have thought of.

And don’t worry – this lengthy intro is just to kick things off… I know your time is precious. From B onwards, I’ll make it quick!!

Obviously, we start with ‘A’, which has a ready-made jumping off point…Anal sex, or knocking at the back door, buggery, digging a ditch…whatever you want to call it, having someone push their cock (or vibrator) up your asshole, remains somewhat taboo amongst conventional heterosexual (and lesbian) couples. Many consider it unnatural, which I guess it is. Anatomically, men and women were designed to procreate, which is why men have lovely big cocks, and women have stretchy pussies able to push out watermelons at will. Our assholes, admittedly, were not made for much more than defecating (although you can get pregnant from anal intercourse). So it’s understandable that people – mostly women – associate anal sex with a great amount of pain and little sexual satisfaction.

But it doesn’t have to be that way…

Like most things in life, you never forget the first time you do something. Flying in a plane, riding a bike, smoking a cigarette, having your ass fucked…..it’s not something you forget in a hurry. But, follow a few simple set of safety rules, and there’s no reason why anal sex can’t be one of the most exhilarating, and intimate, experiences for both of you.

1. Foreplay – your back door is naturally tight, and the nerve endings are numerous. Because it’s important to relax you asshole before penetration, foreplay is vital. If you’re the receiver, get your partner to massage, caress, then gently push at the entrance to your hole. As your body gets used to the ‘invader’, you’ll naturally relax more when it comes to taking the cock, or sex toy, fully.

2. Lubricate, Lubricate! – sounds logical, but lots of people forget. Whereas our pussies will lubricate naturally, when aroused, our asses don’t. Use a suitable lube (if you’re using a toy or condom, make sure the lube is compatible), and plenty of it!

3. Clean Hands Make For Clean Sex – lots of anal exploration is done by your partner’s fingers but, as sexy as it sounds, having your partner finger (or tongue) you, in your pussy, then in your asshole, (or vice versa), isn’t a great idea. A growing number of people are using dental dams – fantastic for anal oral sex, which protect against herpes and other STDs. If you prefer cock all the way, change condoms as you alternate sessions between your cunt and ass, or take time out with a steamy shower romp before you swap positions.

4. Positioning – is vital. It might come as a surprise to some, that the standard position, like you see in the movies – ie. doggy style – isn’t necessarily the best position to adopt, if you’re a relative novice. For beginners (and for many advanced back door operatives), the traditional missionary position is by far the easiest, less-painful way of getting fucked in the ass. Your body is used to relaxing this way, and mentally you already know what to expect – it’s just going to happen in a different hole. Remember, great sex isn’t just about the physical, it’s about the emotional. A relaxed brain means a relaxed body. And that means fantastic fucking.

And, finally…

5. Communication is key. For both men and women, agreeing to let someone screw you up the ass, takes a LOT of trust. You both need to feel comfortable doing it, and feel equally comfortable that you can ask your partner to stop, at any time. The first time WILL hurt, and anyone who tells you differently, is lying. But, do remember your first time having ‘normal’ sex? Well, that hurt, too, right? But it didn’t stop you doing it. And nor should this. Because, after lots of practice, anal sex can be one of the most intense and satisfying ways to get fucked. Believe me, I know.

Another handy tip, to take the fear out of ass-fucking, is to try one of the myriad toys out there, each designed to make the experience one to remember. Anal beads are a great way to get those nerve endings working – the anus has oodles more sensitivity than pussies or cocks – and you can even buy special anal vibrators, to get your party started. Browse one of the many online sex stores – they’re not all filthmongers, most of them actually sell fun, little gadgets that will open a whole new world of playtime to you.

What have you got to lose?

I hope these tips have helped – any questions, comments, or anecdotes of your own first-time experiences, plus any suggestions to help other first-timers, feel free to leave them below.